Life, Shane and the Persuit of Happiness

It's what's on my mind, and yours too. Well, at least that bit about happiness...

Sunday, March 04, 2001

I've got these shivers I can't stop. I've decided she deserves to know exactly whats going on here, after a conversation in which she seems to be oblivious to my dilema. Am I imagining this whole thing? So I call her, and she pollitely tells me she'll call me back when she's off the phone with her mother. That brings us to the present. Now I wait, and shiver, hope I can remember everything I need to tell her. It's been a long time since she told me she'd call me back. Almost half an hour now I think. Will she call? She thinks I'm mad at her even though I told her I'm not. I told her she hasn't done anything wrong. And of course she hasn't. How could I fault her for not sharing the same feelings.
She had to have been talking about us...

I've just made the biggest ass of myself. I feel like one of those pimply characters in some clumsy high school flic whom has just asked out the homecoming queen but received a cute giggle and curious look instead of a passionate kiss. So she hadn't even a clue that I had feelings for her. But she doesn't want it to affect our friendship. I'm such an idiot! How is not going to affect our friendship. What is my freaking problem, everytime I fall in love I wind up screwing it up somehow.
posted by Shane  # 9:50 PM
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